Hello my LJ friends. It's been nearly an entire month since I last wrote to you of my world, thoughts and actions. In that time, not much has happened. I probably had plenty of opportunities, however I have just felt heavy and drained throughout my daily life. It seems like quite a chore to get nearly anything done, resulting in nothing having the slightest increment of progress.

I really do want to change, and I really do want to get out of this rut. But I just can't psyche myself up or over this. So now I'm stuck in this precarious position, trying to get out and I hope that I will be able to recover from this soon because what's life without passion?

I read all of your LJs, I just don't comment too often and I have not gotten around to making a real post in about a month. Or more. Can't even remember. But to sum it up quickly: I'm currently working at CVS still, and in the almost all of my spare time just working on creating, creating and creating. In the next week, expect the following to be online and available for consumption

-3 Youtube videos (first one is already up)
-4 T-Shirts ready to purchase on districtlines
-2 Wallet designs to choose from on my website
-A new MySpace layout
-A new Ecnal website layout
-Personal Business cards

And! I'm currently making 9 shirts for myself. I bought a lot of Hanes V-Neck undershirts and bought dye to color them and the designs will soon be put on them, so be excited for me!

Check out how productive I am! Today was a fun day, well pretty fun. The highlight of my day being a random drive to downtown Plymouth with Nicole where I took some great night time shots (which you can see on MySpace, Flickr, or Facebook if you care.) I'm trying my best to Endure everything going on right now, hoping this overcast sky will have a silver lining on the horizon. One day at a time.

Today was pretty good as far as Lance days go. Got some yardwork done before I went to work today, then worked from 4pm-10pm. After I got off work, Saku txted me and asked me to cover her shift tomorrow from 7am-3pm because of some stuff with her Cedar Point trip. Oh well, more hours means more camera supplies. So I have to wake up at 6am tomorrow after closing the store tonight. Not that it matters as it's 2:33am as I'm writing this :[

Camera News!
Despite knowing you guys probably don't care too much about my camera situation, I'm not going to put it behind a cut. Anyway! I found a site that sells the body of the Canon Rebel T1i for very, very cheap. Meaning I can buy the body from that site and a quality lens from Amazon and be more than set. I want this camera so bad, I'm like an expectant mother. I spent all day looking up accessories and supplies I'll want for my camera when it finally arrives. I'm so pathetic.

What a difference a desk makes, I'm actually getting stuff done. But lets go back to the beginning of this story before I tell you the end.

Since the last entry, I've had revelations on revolutions. I went to Best Buy to apply for a credit card and was promptly denied (not that being denied is a new experience for me) however, Nicole looked at laptops while there. When we got home she expressed her desire for a new laptop and within the hour we were back to Best Buy for Nicole to get a new laptop. Now I don't inherently hate all spoiled kids, but how on Earth could I not be jealous. I know if I was born into a different family I'd be some rockstar millionaire with limitless potential. But right now I'm shooting at being the garbageman from Dilbert.

However, while we were getting the laptop Nicole's dad could see how much I wanted the Canon Rebel T1i. I told him I was going to sell Brutus to help cover the cost of the camera. Note: I am selling Brutus to Darla, a close friend. I would not allow Brutus to go to anyone else, ever. He's my baby.

Well when Mike saw how short I was he offered me a deal. If I could come up with $100 a week he would pay for my camera. Now, this puts me in quite a financial situation, as my credit card is also due this month. A large sum by my standards as well, and being between jobs helps me none. However, I'm banking that with a real SLR in my hands I can get at least one real photography job. A long shot, but one I'm willing to bet on. And worst case scenario I'm short on my credit card and have like $100 in interest. Not bad for how much fake money I've been using for almost 6 months.

The other flaw in this plan for my camera is that Darla doesn't have the money right now. And she doesn't know for sure when she will have it or if she will need it to find a new place. And the waiting is killing me because everyday I'm on Canon's website to look at this camera and dpreview to read it's in depth deview and see the preview images. The wait is killing me.

Now, once home, I helped Nicole set up her new laptop with teeth gritted, but there was a silver lining for me in this story. Nicole is letting me use her old laptop so that I can get some work done. So I cleared off a desk down here and hooked the laptop to a monitor and all of my PC accesories and it's like I have a real PC for once.

Don't ask me what it is, but being at a desk makes me get work done faster. I really can't pinpoint what it is, but I feel much more motivated to work and that's a really good thing. So look forward to more LJ entries and pictures getting edited and sent out faster :]

Hello kids, I'm making a Livejournal while backing up my data. I'm going to reinstall Windows on my computer and hope that it fixes the problems my beast of a machine has been having lately. I know I need a new computer, but I'm on a tight budget right now. I'm thinking of going out on a limb and opening two new credit accounts to purchase the two things I want right now, hoping they will make back the investment before I go broke. Plus they're not too expensive. They are:

Canon Rebel T1i (EOS 500D) w/18mm-55mm IS lens - $870
No, this isn't the real camera I want, but it's what I'm going to have to settle with. This camera is plenty powerful, sporting a 15.1 MP sensor and shooting full 1080p HD movies. The main downgrades from the camera I want are the MP (15.1 < 21.1) and the ISO range isn't as high (12,000 < 24,000) Though they do use the same lenses and many other accessories, so I plan on purchaing this camera until I can save up the $3,000 for the Canon EOS 5D MkII.

Gateway AMD Athlon Phenom X4 9100E - $510
It's no secret that Gamma-Sama (current PC) is long past his prime. How I get any work done at all is actually a real mystery to me. And not to offset my tendancy to procrastinate, but I feel most of the reason I don't do much real work is due to how long it takes Gamma-Sama to process the most simple of tasks.


Now, I don't know for sure if I'm going to apply for $1,380 in credit purchases all at once, but I will make the decision around July 2nd when my current credit card bill is due, depending on how much/if any of it is left. However, I feel this is a longshot, as I'd like to get the front glass on Brutus repaired soon, as well as do minor repairs on Fitzgerald. We'll have to see how it all pans out.

My Livejournal and my life are mirror images right now. Empty of effort and in clear need of motivations. I really need a schedule in my life, and starting tomorrow I'm going to make a real effort to get myself back on task. Including a Livejournal. If I don't make one, someone should come beat me up :[

Hello everyone, my life is kind of in a bit of a rush right now. I nailed the interview at CVS and will start later this week. But right now I'm hanging out at a famous local recording studio taking pictures for Rookie of the Year who are recording their new album. It's quite the life. I'll post a few pictures later.

Recently I can't keep my head on straight. It's like I'm trying as hard as I can to reach rock bottom. No matter how hard I concentrate or try to focus on anything I can not force myself to even do the most mundane and simple of everyday occurances. I don't know for sure what's wrong with me, but I think the methods I've been using to cope with how I feel about my life and future have disconnected something that was important for everyday function. I hope I can rewire myself before it's too late.

• 12:23 really, really needs to edit those photos. About 1,000 piled up from the last week. #
• 13:15 is about to battle his 1,000 photos. if i'm not back in a half hour, you know who won. #
• 15:43 might die of hunger. #
• 16:10 is numb. #
• 16:47 knows he can't have everything he wants, but what if he only wants one thing. #
• 19:20 is less metro station, more she wants revenge. #
• 21:22 wishes you a happy unbirthday. wings in an hour! #
• 22:44 can't believe it Wings. Try to blame that on the refs. #
• 23:00 thanks Johanzen for putting us back at even. Datsyuk should take notes on how to be clutch. #
• 23:16 thanks johanzen. you're the best mule money can buy. #

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• 23:57 thinks the wings need to get it together. #
• 08:19 is at work til noon. #
• 10:03 is really bored at work. you should text me. #
• 11:33 has a half hour to go. now i just need plans for tonight. #
• 12:13 is heading home. #
• 12:37 is taking a shower, and still needs plans for later. #
• 15:00 thinks he should be on your mobile updates, because you're on mine. #
• 15:15 wants to be on lawl dot com. #
• 16:02 forgot about the digg'em scandal. #
• 17:29 hates wgn's new logo. #
• 18:44 thinks that there could be nothing better. #
• 19:21 sung himself sick. #

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• 01:03 does not want. #
• 01:26 is bloodfeastislandman. #
• 11:27 knows this is what to expect. #
• 12:15 says come what may. #
• 16:18 is home safe. #
• 18:31 blames it on rio. #
• 19:56 votes this is the best rifftrax. #
• 22:18 be in your base killing your doods. #

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• 00:49 is in a whisper war. #
• 01:59 means what he says when he says he can't say what he means. #
• 02:12 would do anything, and give everything. but knows he will get nothing. ich bin sehr blod. #
• 02:31 thinks it's funny how fast you forget. #
• 02:44 thinks there are less digits in pi than number of things wrong with this. #
• 03:19 finds it symbolic. #
• 12:12 officially lost everything. #
• 13:38 is planning something big. #
• 19:18 be in yo twitter, stealing yo 140 characters #
• 19:51 hopes he isn't interrupting. #

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• 01:36 knows you are the perfect drug. i'm taking placebos. #
• 02:18 asks what has no power, but still runs. what doesn't change, but will never be the same. #
• 02:37 wishes he could od on this, so he could die happy. #
• 03:40 has a hard time processing that 2010 is next year. #
• 04:13 unlocked akuma #
• 05:46 is battling mothra. #
• 11:33 should never get his hopes up. #
• 12:27 does everything to earn nothing. #
• 14:26 knows the photographers place is out of frame. #
• 14:37 at the opera tonight. #
• 14:57 wants you to protect me from what i want. #
• 15:07 hopes theres nothing you aren't saying, you might not get the chance to say them later. #
• 17:05 is one with nature. in chris terms an elemental shaman. #
• 18:44 would be dead if this were a horror movie. #
• 21:07 of all the things. kangaroo, bedside table. #
• 23:29 is in a tale! of! interest! #

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• 23:55 can't feel pain #
• 11:44 is an espada. #
• 14:15 has broke two phones over you now #
• 15:47 knows he'll drive you down the same streets that i did. smile like you mean it. #
• 16:19 couldn't hate you anymore than do now. #
• 18:11 got the number of scene kids. #
• 20:42 is the happiest man on earth. and hates chun li. hates. #
• 22:09 is at blueroof with @demonsangel1990 @nicoleasaurus and chris. #

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